Let's brew: Lulu is a crimelord

[pokken]

I got this idea from another thread on cool backgrounds and I love it. I need another orzhov deck like a diaper rash but I'm doing it anyway.

The theme is - Lulu is a secret crime lord.

So we want cards that talk about her extensive criminal enterprise. Smugglers share, murder, assassinate, black market, etc etc. because I am a filthy socialist we will consider anything financial as potential (e.g. land tax) but will not discuss the political questions that involves in the thread please.

Ideas?

No power level gating for now.

[ISBPathfinder]

Random side note but I suspect you might get better results with non partner / background based projects just because my first thought was.... why would you pair those two together. In a sense you have already made very large decisions for the direction from the get go that might be hard to get the community to agree on. It isn't to say that picking any commander isn't a decision but there is a lot of personal play preferences / meta / flavor decisions that go into pairing a partner or background in a lot of cases.

That said.... Altar of Dementia. Fill up that graveyard seems important and we are going to be creature based probably. You also probably want to look into some means to give evasion to creatures who lack it naturally or allow them to tap into things. I suppose some Vehicles might be a reasonable consideration as it covers a few of these ideas.

[void_nothing]

Random side note but I suspect you might get better results with non partner / background based projects just because my first thought was.... why would you pair those two together.

And why not? I think pokken's reason for wanting a deck with this theme is self-explanatory: Because it's funny. And not only that, the commander and the Background synergize.

I like several Assassins here: Fleshtaker, Stronghold Assassin, Mari, the Killing Quill... Dark Impostor is also effective if you're getting Lulu's untaps.

[kirkusjones]

Athreos, God of Passage and maybe Athreos, Shroud-Veiled. Gotta pay the toll.

[hyalopterouslemur]

Obvious build is Aristocrats. I assume Ashnod's Altar is going in this deck?

[TheAmericanSpirit]

Pitiless Plunderer is an absolute must here.
Underworld Connections and Black Market Connections and Night Dealings and Life Insurance and Protection Racket all seem fitting.

[void_nothing]

Obvious build is Aristocrats.

Yup, and with a particular emphasis on going wide. Endrek Sahr, Master Breeder? Thrullmaking is probably a crime in most decent societies.

[void_nothing]

Pitiless Plunderer is an absolute must here.

To that end, is Revel in Riches too obnoxious?

[Mookie]

The ability to untap your creatures with Lulu, Loyal Hollyphant makes me want to include some tap abilities, some of which can pair nicely with an aristocrats strategy - Bloodline Keeper // Lord of Lineage, Fain, the Broker, Thraben Doomsayer... plus plenty of crime-adjacent cards like Bounty Hunter, Stronghold Assassin, and Royal Assassin. Keeper of the Dead looks like a potential hidden gem.

...full assassin tribal is probably a bit much though.

[void_nothing]

Keeper of the Dead looks like a potential hidden gem.

Oh yes! She'll always be on in this kinda deck which is pretty cool. It's a pity the white Keeper is hot doodoo unless you're all-in on a pay-life theme or something.

[Ruiner]

I'm just gonna throw out a quick plug for my Kiku decklist (in my signature). It's a bad deck, just full of assassins, thieves, and other criminal elements. You could probably find quite a bit of inspiration for the black portion of the deck there.

Also, assuming you are creatures heavy, I would consider Morality Shift as a surprise possible instantly lethal growth combo with the background.

As far as white cards I think a number of orzhov cards with Extort probably fit well with the theme idea.

[Igzex]

First of all what have I done?!

Second perhaps you could include creatures with names that also apply to Lulu, like Highway Robber, Notorious Assassin, Cruel Sadist, Grand Abolisher, Shattered Angel, and Kami of False Hope

edit: Oh and obviously cards like Merciless Executioner and Plaguecrafter are perfect for the deck in more ways than one.

[void_nothing]

Also, assuming you are creatures heavy, I would consider Morality Shift as a surprise possible instantly lethal growth combo with the background.

It's hard for me to overstate how much of a funny play that would be. I second this recommendation.

[Gentle Giant]

We'll, we just had a mobster set, so I recommend just going over the White and black cards of those sets. Getaway Car, while not synergistic with anything, really, seems like a fun one. I've got a Gonti mobster/exentric billionaire deck, but I don't have a list online for it.
Contract Killing, Grisly Spectacle, Audacious Thief... Just some cards that popped into my head. Some goad might also be nice, a la bribing someone

[pokken]

I should say I am far less concerned with synergy than with funny or cool visuals. Lulu the flying angel driving a getaway car made me laugh out loud.

It's fine if the cards are good but amusing or very on theme is key. Lots of fantastic ideas in here so far.

[pokken]

Obvious build is Aristocrats. I assume Ashnod's Altar is going in this deck?

Hmm maybe. It's not quite crimesy enough?

Maybe there are some sac outlets that are more on theme tho.

[kirkusjones]

Obvious build is Aristocrats. I assume Ashnod's Altar is going in this deck?

Hmm maybe. It's not quite crimesy enough?

Maybe there are some sac outlets that are more on theme tho.

High Market and Miren, the Moaning Well (the moans are from those dumb enough to cross our angelic elephant queenpin).

[Gentle Giant]

Some other fun cards:
-Hold for Ransom
-Buy Your Silence
-Deal Gone Bad
-Cut of the Profits
-Illicit Shipment
-Incriminate
-Sanguine Spy (sac outlet?)
-Ominous Parcel

You could also play some flicker as though you're sending someone on a hit job, but that is somewhat of a nonbo with Lulu's +1/+1 counters..

[FenrirRex]

I would go pretty deep on rogue tribal here, especially because Lulu and Oona's Blackguard are clearly bffs. Pile on those counters and start emptying hands! Making Nighthawk Scavenger huge is still one of my favorite things to do in a game, and Grim Hireling similarly goes hard here.

Edit: Oh, also don't forget Jailbreak. New Capenna is full of great flavorful inclusions.

[Dragoon]

The Orzhov guild is also crime-oriented: Cartel Aristocrat, Final Payment, Orzhova, the Church of Deals, Syndicate Enforcer, Syndicate Guildmage, Syndicate Messenger, Syndic of Tithes, Tithe Taker, Smothering Tithe.

[ISBPathfinder]

Thankfully you can justify literally infinite vehicles as the getaway car and they also give you a synergystic means to tap all of your creatures that wouldn't be able to attack profitably.

Also Smuggler's Copter fits your theme in multiple means being the getaway copter. Looting also fits your background well.

[Dragoon]

While not legal, Frankie Peanuts sounds like a perfect fit theme-wise, perhaps Lulu's father?

[Igzex]

It also must be known that Lulu commits her crimes with No Mercy. In fact, Lulu may even feel Sadistic Glee. Lulu has orchestrated many a Catastrophe, such as The Meathook Massacre.

[Jemolk]

So, for my suggestions, I've gone through and linked specific versions of cards wherever it matters for the sake of art and/or flavor text.

Black Market is another good one. However, white cards are seriously underrepresented. We need to show the malevolent side of white To that end, I propose Pariah|16795, Condemn|30960, Spelltithe Enforcer, Suppression Field, Sanctimony|51249, and Arrest|34442.

Since you mention financial stuff being viable, I also decided to look for things referencing debt. The noteworthy ones in terms of flavor are Debt to the Deathless, Debtors' Knell, Debtor's Pulpit, and Debtors' Transport. Searching Scryfall for these sorts of themes is rather difficult, I have to say. Damn shame -- been thinking about how to build an Esper Capitalist Democracy deck around Tivit, Seller of Secrets, so I'm going to have to try again for financial stuff soonish.

I also recommend this version of Godless Shrine.

[Neptune]

If you want complete jank, this may be the deck for Mercenary Rebel tribal. I bet she's run into a few in her rough past. Have Rebel Informer or Mercenary Informer put itself on the bottom, search it back up, put counters on things.