November MCC Round 3 - Mentor

[Raptorchan]

Artwork by Vincent Proce

November MCC Round 3

Mentor

What's a planeswalker without those who guide them, who teach them what's right and wrong? Today we pay tributes to their mentors, their teachers, to those who are responsible for what our planeswalkers have become!

Main Challenge - Design a legendary creature card portraying a mentor of your chosen planeswalker.

Subchallenge 1 - Your card is rare or mythic.

Subchallenge 2 - Your card has mana value 4 or greater.

Clarifications

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Main Challenge - For example, there was a cycle of mentors in Magic Origins.

Subchallenge 1 - Rare or mythic is pretty much self-explanatory.

Subchallenge 2 - Mana value 4 or greater means no less than 4.

DEADLINES

Design Deadline: Friday, December 1st 2023 at 23:59 Eastern Time

Judging Deadline: Thursday, December 7th 2023 at 23:59 Eastern Time

MCC Rubric

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The MCC Rubric is given below, in an easily "copy and pasted" form. (Courtesy of Rithaniel.)

Code: Select all

[b]Design[/b]
[b](X/3) Appeal[/b] - Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card?
[b](X/3) Elegance[/b] - Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense?
 
[b]Development[/b]
[b](X/3) Viability[/b] - How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity?
[b](X/3) Balance[/b] - Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment?
 
[b]Creativity[/b]
[b](X/3) Uniqueness[/b] - Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel "fresh"?
[b](X/3) Flavor[/b] - Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players?
 
[b]Polish[/b]
[b](X/3) Quality[/b] - Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating.
[b](X/2) Main Challenge (*)[/b] - Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge?
[b](X/2) Subchallenges[/b] - One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition.
 
[b]Total: X/25[/b]
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

Pairings are determined by 1d6.

bravelion83 vs slimytrout
Ryder vs shullz
netn10 vs AnotherAlias

Both judges will judge all cards, and the highest combined score in each pairing will advance to the final round. Let the judging begin!

[bravelion83]

Raklan, Wise Taskmage 1GGU
Legendary Creature — Human Druid (R)
When Raklan, Wise Taskmage enters the battlefield, if you cast it, create your choice of three 0/1 green Plant creature tokens or a 3/3 green Beast creature token.
Whenever a player casts a spell during another player's turn, exile the top card of your library, then you may put a land card you own from your hand or exile onto the battlefield tapped. If you don't, put the exiled card into your hand.
"...and Garruk, remember this most of all: anyone who can speak can lie. Expect deceit. I love you, son."
2/2

[Ryder]

Light-Paws of the Seven Tails 2WU
Legendary Creature — Fox Advisor (M)
As long as you have seven or more cards in hand, enchantment spells you cast cost 7 less to cast.
Grandeur — Discard another card named Light-Paws of the Seven Tails: Look at the top seven cards of your library. You may reveal an enchantment card from among them and put it into your hand. Put the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.
2/3

[shullz]

Ludmilla, Protective Golgari Leader
Legendary Creature — Gorgon (R)
Deathtouch
: Another target creature you control gets +0/+2 and gains deathtouch until end of turn.
Whenever a creature you control with deathtouch dies, you may put a loyalty counter on a Vraska planeswalker you control.
"You're not alone my doves, I'm here."
2/5

[slimytrout]

Ghazz, Electric Expert 2UR
Legendary Creature — Human Artificer (R)
Whenever one or more artifacts enter the battlefield under your control, Ghazz, Electric Expert deals 1 damage to each opponent.
Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, create a tapped Treasure token. Then if you control ten or more artifacts, you may sacrifice Ghazz and draw seven cards.
"Enough tinkering for today. Could you lock up?"
3/3

[void_nothing]

Pinging @netn10 and @AnotherAlias!

[netn10]

Subject #99, Voracious Dreamer 2BG
Legendary Creature - Human Child (Mythic)
As long as Subject #99 is tapped, whenever a creature card is milled, exile it. When you do, put a +1/+1 counter on Subject #99, create a 1/1 green and black Insect creature token and put a loyalty counter on each Grist planeswalker you control.
"The child sleeps hungry but wakes up full, possibly linked to Grist as a manifestation of their subconscious. Describing unknown places despite never having been outside Hollowdale further solidifies a connection, warranting investigation to prevent potential intraplanar issues. Bottom line, keep the child occupied."
- Department of Possibility Report, File "Voracious Dreamer"
1/1

[AnotherAlias]

Kirstre, Mentor of Masks
Legendary Creature — Human Wizard (Rare)
When Kirstre, Mentor of Masks enters the battlefield, create a Masked Apprentice token and put it onto the battlefield under your control. (Masked Apprentice is a 1/1 white and blue Human Wizard creature card with a mana cost of that has "You may have Masked Apprentice enter the battlefield as a copy of a nonlegendary creature you control.")
: Exile another target creature you control, then return it to the battlefield under your control.
"You are already good with masks, but I can see that you can be better. Embrace the powers they give, though you must not forget yourself in the process. Come, Estrid, let us show you how it's done."
—Kirstre, to Estrid
3/6

[Raptorchan]

Let's judge.

[Raptorchan]

Guess I am prolonging judge deadline for two more days.

bravelion83

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Design
(2,5/3) Appeal - It has okayish baseline for Timmy, Spike must be slightly interested in value it provides, Johnny loves the fact that the second ability is not meant for opponents only and smiles.
(2/3) Elegance - This card pushes limites of wordiness. And the second confusing part is "put a land card you own from your hand or exile onto the battlefield tapped". Some players may struggle to comprehend what "you own from your hand" means when you aren't playing the silver border.

Development
(3/3) Viability - I see no problems here. It probably can work in monogreen only but since it intended to work with your spells too, blue feels like a fair game.
(2,5/3) Balance - No serious issues with this card's balance. It's an okay limited workhorse and it can generate value in constructed. Probably because of restrictive mana cost it won't make any waves in eternal formats though.

Creativity
(2,5/3) Uniqueness - Both effects are known but tweaked to work quite differently from previous cards. Especially second one, a more complex version of "draw a card if a player casts a spell during another player's turn."
(3/3) Flavor - Strong, evocative and heartwarming flavor. Need to say, this card's textbox actually doesn't have a place for flavor text though and though.

Polish
(2,5/3) Quality - Yet again, "card you own from your hand" feels wrong. The closest you need is a formatting from Kaya the Inexorable - "from your hand or from among cards you own in exile".
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Yes and yes.

Total: 22/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

slimytrout

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Design
(3/3) Appeal - Timmy likes the monstrous reward of this card, Spike and Johnny see fuel or whatever they w for their schemes.
(3/3) Elegance - It's a very elegant card with two perfectly understandable abilities. However, see Quality section.

Development
(3/3) Viability - It fits into blue-red part of the color wheel just well. Powerlevel wise, it feels in between rare ad mythic but closer to rare.
(2/3) Balance - No serious issues with this card's balance. It can generate value in constructed, but less viable in limited. Probably because of restrictive mana cost it won't make any waves in eternal formats though.

Creativity
(2/3) Uniqueness - Both abilities are very well known and present on actual cards but in slightly different way. Third one makes it more unique.
(3/3) Flavor - I appreciate the fact you have found a character that was Ral's actual mentor since it's not the most common knowledge. Many would have missed this part. Flavor text puts it all together.

Polish
(2,5/3) Quality - You can prove me wrong if you have an example but right now I believe the last ability must say "You may sacrifice CARDNAME. When you do..."
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Yes and yes.

Total: 22,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

Ryder

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Design
(2/3) Appeal - Timy is fascinated by this card no matter how bad it turns out in his hands. Johnny can see some interesting combos with the most devastating enchantments he can find. Spike doesn't care.
(3/3) Elegance - That's a perfectly understandable card.

Development
(2,5/3) Viability - I have to say, if this card needed a second color, it would have ben green and not blue. There are 0 blue cards related to the first ability and only two blue cards related to he second ability, one of them is hybrid. In other words, use of blue here is at least questionable, not to mention that blue in modern Kamigawa is tied more to artifacts rather than enchantments. It could be monowhite just fine. Mythic feels okay due to unique effects of the card.
(1,5/3) Balance - It's a rather specific mythic card that mostly doesn't live up to expectations. It has almost no use in limited, very high ceiling for constructed, and after all, in Commander its playability is the highest but reduced by the nature of Commander where Grandeur simple can't be used. Which is aa shame because personally I like this card very much.

Creativity
(3/3) Uniqueness - It deserves the highest score, however, for the unique use of mechanics.
(3/3) Flavor - Everything about this card's flavor is perfect (maybe besides the use of blue). Seven theme (I appreciate that you used the ft Light-Paws had seven tails until Emperor returned) and the hand size matters theme from old Kamigawa. Simple brilliant.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - No issues here.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Yes.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both yes.

Total: 22/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

shullz

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Design
(2/3) Appeal - Timmy sees a nasty card to use in combat. Johnny sees a comborific card that can be used in some weird strategies. Spike doesn't see anything.
(3/3) Elegance - No issues with this card.

Development
(3/3) Viability - I don't see any problems here. Technically, it can be hybrid or even monocolored, but I guess with toughness boost and "dies" clause it lens more into Black territory.
(2/3) Balance - Despite being a nasty limited bomb, this card has very limited (pun intended) use in constructed. However, must see play in Brawl where you use Vraska as commander. That's all.

Creativity
(2,5/3) Uniqueness - Although cards that reward planeswalkers with loyalty counters when someone dies exist, other than that it's quite unique.
(2,5/3) Flavor - Yet again I'm going to be subjective and want to say that the name is too generic and self-explanatory. Other than that, no problems.

Polish
(2,5/3) Quality - I am not English native so more fluent speakers can correct me, but. Shouldn't the flavor text say "You're not alone, my doves"?
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Met.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.

Total: 21,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

netn10

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Design
(1/3) Appeal - I am afraid only Johnny can be interested in such card. For Timmy and Ska, it's a very fragile card that doesn't generate any value immediately and doesn't work on its own.
(2/3) Elegance - Quite a wordy and long ability, but pretty understandable. However, rulex text plus flavor text pushes the boundaries what can fit on a card, resultion in 10 lines of text total.

Development
(3/3) Viability - It can be hybrid, monoblack and monogreen just as well as multicolored, so that's up to you. For such a specific card, mythic rarity seems fine.
(1,5/3) Balance - That's quite a weak card that doesn't live up to expectations. Maybe it can find use in commander, but it needs setup (and more than one - it needs to be protected when attacks and it needs a mill engine) so constructed use is highly unlikely with such cost.

Creativity
(2,5/3) Uniqueness - Although cards that boost planeswalkers with loyalty counters exist in numbers, other than that it's quite unique.
(2,5/3) Flavor - Interesting concept of a planeswalker insect somehow related to a human kid that shares a mind/conscience with it or whatever you implied here. My small nitpick is the use of a symbol # in the card name.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - No issues.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Met.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.

Total: 19,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

AnotherAlias

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Design
(2,5/3) Appeal - Timmy and Johnny would like to copy their valuable stuff. Spike is less interested due to the card being expensive and situational. However, blinking ability is also appealing.
(1/3) Elegance - This card has about 12 lines of text which is just too much. The first ability is hella confusing because creating tokens that are cards with mana cost is something not just unprecedented (in paper and in black border!), but also is against the rules as far as I know. The blinking ability is quite tricky to because it allows you to steal stuff you don't own, see Cloudshift.

Development
(3/3) Viability - It's a blue/white card but it can be monoblue as well but let's say blinking is more white territory. Can't be hybrid though.
(2,5/3) Balance - It's an expensive and situational card that can generate value but it's far from being a real bomb.

Creativity
(2,5/3) Uniqueness - Blinking is not unprecedented, but creating tokens that can decide to clone something or not is.
(3/3) Flavor - I have no issues with the flavor of this card although its textbox clearly doesn't have enough room for it.

Polish
(1/3) Quality - You made some critical mistakes here. Tokens aren't cards and paper rules currently don't support conjuring (Arena digital-only mechanic). Tokens don't have mana cost unless they're copying something - but not on their own. Putting tokens on the battlefield under your control after creating is simply redundant and isn't needed to be worded. The entire ability must be rewritten as "Create a 1/1 white and blue Human Wizard creature token named Masked Apprentice with "You may have Masked Apprentice enter the battlefield as a copy of a nonlegendary creature you control." And I guess if you wanted the second ability to blink said tokens - it won't work because tokens cease to exist when they leave the battlefield.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Met.
(2/2) Subchallenges - Both met.

Total: 19,5/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

Current results

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bravelion83 22 vs slimytrout 22,5
Ryder 22 vs shullz 21,5
netn10 19,5 vs AnotherAlias 19,5

[void_nothing]

bravelion83

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Design
(3/3) Appeal - Txmmy likes the ramp, Jxnny likes the ability to get any of your lands out of exile, and Spike sees plenty of value for doing things they're already doing.
(2/3) Elegance - That second triggered ability is multi-part and relatively complex, and this really doesn't feel like it needs an "if you cast it" clause for the ETB - token generation is hardly the strongest ability you could have there, unless there would be some kind of two-card infinite combo in the same Standard environment as this card.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors and rarity are what they should be.
(2.5/3) Balance - Something that essentially says "whenever a player casts an instant spell, draw a card" and more is potentially a bit pushed, but ultimately the 2/2 body is relatively fragile and it takes work to make this really go off.

Creativity
(2/3) Uniqueness - We've seen "whenever you cast during an opponent's turn" as a theme for Faeries but counting anyone doing it is something different, and the ability has its own unique wrinkles as a decisiony half-Explore.
(2.5/3) Flavor - Something about this flavor text strikes me as going on a bit too long. Otherwise, a fair representation of an existing character.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Looks good.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done,
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 22/25

Ryder

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Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - Txmmy likes the huge cost reduction, Jxnny obviously has plenty of things to do with this card, and Spike might see this as overly build-around but could readily play an enchantment-focused control build with it.
(3/3) Elegance - A relatively wordy card that's still easy to follow thanks to the unifying theme of the 7s.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors and rarity look good.
(2.5/3) Balance - How good this card is would depend on the enchantments in its environment, obviously.

Creativity
(2/3) Uniqueness - Obviously cost reductions and pseudo-tutors are well-trodden ground (and grandeur is an existing mechanic) but this is a neat combination of old effects.
(3/3) Flavor - Light-Paws did indeed have seven tails at the time she trained the Wanderer, and the mechanics of this card are a nice overt reflection of that.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Looks good.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 23/25

shullz

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Design
(1/3) Appeal - Txmmy likes granting keywords and making planeswalkers stronger. This card is a bit too narrow for Jxnny, and Spike expects a lot more from a four-mana rare legend than something that's hard to attack into and depends on having a specific planeswalker type out in order to fully function.
(3/3) Elegance - Sure, nothing wrong here.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors look right and while this might be a disappointing rare for some, it still is rare.
(2.5/3) Balance - Not overpowered, and maybe even a bit underpowered, for Constructed, but boy would this card be annoying in Limited.

Creativity
(1.5/3) Uniqueness - Granting deathtouch is nothing new, but caring about creatures with deathtouch and the loyalty counter adding ability have not been done that much before.
(2.5/3) Flavor - The name of this card is long - in fact it's long enough for the text to be squished in the render, which doesn't look appealing.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Looks fine.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 20.5/25

slimytrout

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Design
(3/3) Appeal - Txmmy wants to be able to draw seven cards off this (repeatedly if it's their commander). Jxnny has plenty of moving parts to play with. Spike sees something that will reward them with ramp and pinging opponents for spellslinging, which makes this a very viable piece for any spellslinger deck.
(2.5/3) Elegance - A little bit of tracking and trigger complexity here, but nothing too difficult to understand.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Definitely feels like a UR rare Artificer.
(3/3) Balance - Looks alright - relatively strong but pretty easy to remove and creating tapped Treasures limits the explosivity somewhat.

Creativity
(1.5/3) Uniqueness - Basically a mashup card of so many things its colors do these days.
(3/3) Flavor - Works for me - the tinkerer whom Ral was briefly apprenticed to isn't that fleshed out but this card seems to fit him.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Looking good.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 23/25

netn10

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Design
(2/3) Appeal - Basically a pure Txmmy/Jxnny card. While this can be explosive and get to a huge size if you solve the puzzle, as it were, Spike is never going to jump through the hoops required.
(2.5/3) Elegance - That is a really complex multipart triggered ability, but ultimately none of the individual parts (exiling cards, placing +1/+1 counters, creating 1/1 vanilla tokens, and placing loyalty counters) is actually complicated on its own.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors definitely fit, and this is strange enough to be mythic.
(3/3) Balance - No issues - this card is pretty unreliable and needs a lot of building around for its ability to even be relevant. Once it gets cooking it becomes good, but you will likely need a non-combat way to tap creatures (probably convoke cards or something along those lines), consistent mill, and preferably multiple Grist planeswalkers, assuming more are printed beyond Grist, the Hunger Tide.

Creativity
(2.5/3) Uniqueness - Definitely some unique ideas here even if the result doesn't do any one innovative thing.
(2.5/3) Flavor - Really out-there and I like it - this feels like a Magic-ified version of an SCP story. Flavor text just goes on a bit long, though.

Polish
(2/3) Quality - I feel like this isn't quite the right use of "As long as" - I'd format this "Whenever a creature card is put into a graveyard from a library while Subject #99 is tapped, exile that card."
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 21.5/25

AnotherAlias

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Design
(3/3) Appeal - Particularly for EDH, I think a legend that has a blink ability and gives you a free Clone could appeal to any of the player psychographics.
(1/3) Elegance - So, let's talk that token. There are a number of logistical reasons that tokens other than copies have no mana costs, even stuff like Cloudseeder's Cloud Sprite token where it represents an actual existing card. Even embalm and eternalize specifically remove mana costs to prevent confusion with printed tokens; you don't want those to have mana costs on them so people don't include them in decks. Masked Apprentice being a predefined token is really bizarre to me as well, and tokens are really and truly a nonbo with Kirstre's other ability. I would say you'd be way better served in this instance making this a digital-only design that conjures a card named Masked Apprentice. Yes, there are mechanical differences, but ultimately tokens having a CMC other than zero and counting towards devotion, etc., is very nonintuitive.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors and rarity look okay (although Masked Apprentice isn't really appropriate as a hybrid-mana card if it were a card, but that's neither here nor there).
(2.5/3) Balance - Probably bound to be just about as annoying as other commanders with similar themes in EDH, lol. In a Standard environment it would probably be fine.

Creativity
(1.5/3) Uniqueness - Nothing all that innovative going on here other than the token this card produces being pretty odd in formatting terms. Ultimately this is a mashup of two very old effects, cloning and flickering.
(2/3) Flavor - Another card with overly long flavor text, and this is very minor but it annoys me: You don't need to attribute the quote in that way on a card representing the speaker and that names the person they're addressing in the text of the quote itself.

Polish
(2.5/3) Quality - "Create" already means "put onto the battlefield" for tokens, so this card's first line is very redundant.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 19.5/25

Totals

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bravelion83 22 vs. slimytrout 23
Ryder 23 vs. shullz 20.5
netn10 21.5 vs. AnotherAlias 19.5

[Raptorchan]

Totals:

bravelion83 44 vs Slimytrout 45,5
Ryder 45 vs shullz 42
netn10 41 vs AnotherAlias 39

Final round is gonna be posted soon!