"Captain" Zapp Brannigan
Legendary Creature — Human Pilot Employee
At the beginning of combat on your turn, target nonland permanent you control becomes a Vehicle artifact until end of turn. Its base power and toughness are each equal to its mana value. It has Crew 2 and "Crash Land —Whenever this Vehicle deals damage, roll a six-sided die. If the result is equal to this Vehicle’s mana value, it deals that much damage to any target, then sacrifice this vehicle."
"When I'm in command, son, every mission's a suicide mission."