September CCL, Signups/Round 2: Champion of the Natural World

User avatar
void_nothing
Look On My Sash...
Posts: 14927
Joined: 4 years ago
Answers: 124
Pronoun: he / him
Location: Tal Terig, Zendikar

Post by void_nothing » 4 years ago

Going to extend the critique period for the first two rounds by 24 hours - you have until 23:59 Eastern tomorrow, so get your critiques and top 3s in!
Psst, check the second page of Custom Card Contests & Games! Because of the daily contests, a lot of games fall down to there.

The greatest (fake) pro wrestling on the internet - Collaborative Create-A-Booster - My random creations (updated regularly)

Important Facts: Colorless is not a color, Wastes is not a land type, Changeling is not a creature type

Henlock
Posts: 1510
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: Unlisted
Contact:

Post by Henlock » 4 years ago

barbecube: I like the tap ability here. The connection between the elements seems in touch with the ability. The ETB is a bit weird, althought dust has been used in disenchant effects, it is more like drying and crumbling than neing affected by a dust storm.

Marioguy: I think the ideas are there, but the legend seems a bit unnefective costwise. This would be better at a smaller scale.

netn10: Big and Bad and a very good finisher. pairs nicely with first and doublestrikera and it has a really potent damage ability. Probably need to be worded as to make it clearer, as it might cause confusion when several sources damage at the same time. The Moon trigger and the counters on damage ability set the elemental mood veey well.

BeneTleliax: Not legendary,, but let:s say we baptize it and we change that. The symmetrical effect is very powerful. Having this in the command zone will punish land ramping without doing unpopular things, which is something Commander definitely needs.

Gateways7: A bit off of the pie. The static ability is a bit underwhelming. Snowfall gives the idea that it works with snowcovered lands, but the rule text is against the expectation. I don't feel this is a white card.

slimeytrout: This is very complicated to turn on in blue. Blue pinging has fallen out of fashion, awhen a second color is added, things get easier. As a commander, I would be worried of not being able to wake him consistently.




1. Nemt10
2. Benetlilax
3. barnecube

User avatar
bravelion83
MKM MCC going on now
Posts: 4041
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: he / him
Location: Florence, Italy

Post by bravelion83 » 4 years ago

void_nothing wrote:
4 years ago
Going to extend the critique period for the first two rounds by 24 hours - you have until 23:59 Eastern tomorrow, so get your critiques and top 3s in!
I misread the critique deadline, I thought it was the 18th, not the 16th. I've just realized my mistake now, so this is much appreciated.
Critiques (done)
Show
Hide
marioguy3 wrote:
4 years ago
Themes: Speed (Red) and Metal (White)

Marque, Construction Apprentice
Legendary Creature — Human Artificer
Flash, split second
When Marque, Construction Apprentice enters the battlefield, create two 1/1 colorless construct artifact creature tokens.
, Tap two untapped artifact creatures you control: Return Marque, Construction Apprentice to its owner's hand.
2/3
Missing rarity. Rarity is a fundamental part of a card, it not being there is just too big of a thing to vote for this card. I'm sorry. But I also want you to know that if it weren't for that, I would have absolutely nothing against the design of this card. Quality mistake: "construct" is a subtype and thus needs to be capitalized, as subtypes always are.
barbecube wrote:
4 years ago
nonblue wind, nonred dust

Edha, the Desert Wind 2WW
Legendary Creature — Elemental Shaman (R)
Whenever Edha, the Desert Wind attacks, for each creature defending player controls, they pay 1 or tap it.
When Edha dies, you may destroy target artifact.
3/3
Nothing wrong with this card, even though I'm not convinced the wording of the first ability is right. But both chosen elements are there, and I also like how short and elegant this card is compared to others in my bracket.
Henlock wrote:
4 years ago
Grain and Seasons

Wickerheart, Greeted at Autumn 2bb
Legendary Creature - Scarecrow Avatar (m)
When Wickerheart, Greeted at Autumn attacks, you may search your library for a basic swamp card and put it onto the battlefield tapped under defending player's control, then shuffle your library. If you do, destroy target land that player controls.
Wickerheart has +4/+4 as long as there are seven or more basic swamps.on the battlefield.
4/4
This is not strictly forbidden in black border as putting cards from your library into your opponent's hand, but I think this effect isn't that far from that. I'd like it much more if it said "destroy target land, its controller searches their library for a basic land". No problems with the last ability. I'm also not a big fan of the name honestly. Might still make the cut in my top 3, but only due to lack to better options.
RaikouRider wrote:
4 years ago
R1: Non-black Blood

R2: Non-red Stone + Non-green Flesh

Mergo the Stonegrafter 2WW
Legendary Creature - Kor Artificer {R}
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may put a petrification counter on target non-artifact creature.
Creatures with petrification counters on them are indestructible, can't attack or block, and their abilities can't be activated.
When Mergo the Stonegrafter leaves the battlefield, remove all petrification counters from all creatures.
3/3
I read the challenge to mean that one of the elements had to be the same as round 1, in fact everybody in my bracket did it that way (I've checked comparing this thread to that of round 1) except for you and kateodonnell, who didn't participate in round 1. If I were judging this card in the MCC, I'd say it failed the Main Challenge and it would be DQ'ed, so for the same reason, I'm ignoring it here. I'm sorry. I don't think I have misread the challenge.
As a brief comment on the card in a vacuum, this is certainly white in the color pie, but as I've read the card I've immediately thought of Vraska and gorgons in general, which aren't white in Magic. I'd either modify the card's text to be able to colorshift the card and flavor it as a gorgon thing, or change the name of the counters to something other than "petrification". I think that's the main thing that's making me think of gorgons. Also, Xathrid Gorgon already uses petrification counters, and that certainly doesn't help.
kwanyeegor-ii wrote:
4 years ago
Nonblue ice
Nonred energy (kinetic)

Raghort, the Rolling Avalanche 3GG
Legendary Snow Creature--Giant Barbarian (Mythic)
Trample
At the beginning of your upkeep, choose one -
• Put a +1/+1 counter on Raghort for each snow creature you control
• Put a +1/+1 counter on each snow creature you control
3/3
The name should be bolded, and this is a big thing as I've already mentioned to you multiple times. The double dash in the type line is also a technical mistake and I also remember having already mentioned this before. The same goes for the missing periods at the end of sentences. MSE also shows me the type line doesn't actually fits in the frame, it's too long. No problems with the specific design, but too many of what in the MCC would be called "Quality mistakes" for me to consider voting for this card. I'm sorry.
kateodonnell wrote:
4 years ago
Wind (Nonblue) + Soil (Nonblack)

Merki, Bane of the Sky
Legendary Creature - Giant Druid (Rare)
Reach
XG: Monstrosity X.
When Merki, Bane of the Sky becomes monstrous Merki, Bane of the Sky deals X damage to each creature with flying, where X is Merki's Power. Whenever a creature deal damage this way dies this turn, search your library for a forest card and put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle your library.


The beasts of the sky will now feed the soil
4/6
Huge Quality problems, as they would be called in the MCC. The name should be bolded, and this is a big thing. Also missing mana tags, and that's another big thing. A comma is missing between the trigger and the effect, and this is a functional thing that technically makes that ability not work in the rules. There should also technically be a space between the name and mana cost, but that's a minor thing. Typos: "a creature dealt damage this way..." is missing a "t", "forest" should be capitalized in "forest card" because it's a subtype and those are always capitalized, the "and" right afterwards should be a comma, and a period is missing at the end of the flavor text. No problems with the design in itself, the only thing might be the text being a bit too long, but the card is unprintable as is because of all the Quality issues. I still need to put it into my top 3 for lack of better options. Please try to pay more attention to this kind of things in your future designs. Details are important, and not just in Magic card design.
So, a card with missing rarity, a technical DQ, and two cards with huge Quality problems. The remaining two cards are the first two places, and I have to regretfully choose one of the others for my third place. Not a very good bracket for me this time. But always remember: here, as in any other contest, I'm only judging your cards. I'm not judging you. Please don't take any of what I've written here personally.

Top 3
1st place: barbecube
2nd place: Henlock
3rd place: kateodonnell
Author of the MCC Guidelines and FAQ. | For my projects, including Jeff Lionheart, my murder mystery story "One pierced heart, two mindful horns", and republished articles from my series "The Lion's Lair", see Leo's content index (Last updated on March 24th 2024 - Added OPHTMH Episode 4).
After I'm done republishing my articles I want to reprise the series focusing it more on editing, wording, and templating. Suggest potential future article topics here.
My CCCG Resume (Updated on February 27th 2024)
Show
Hide
Blue = MTGSalvation Green = MTGNexus
MCC - Winner (9): Oct 2014, Apr Nov 2017, Jan 2018, Apr Jun 2019, Jan Mar 2022, Apr 2023 || Host (30): Dec 2014, Apr Jul Aug Dec 2015, Mar Jul Aug Oct 2016, Feb Jul 2017, Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last on MTGS), Aug 2019 (first on MTGN) Oct 2019, Jan Jun 2020 Apr Oct 2021, Feb May Sep Dec 2022, Mar Jun Sep Dec 2023, Mar 2024 || Judge (58): every month from Nov 2014 to Nov 2016 except Oct 2015, every month from Feb to Jul 2017 except Apr 2017, then Oct 2017, May Jun Nov 2018, Feb Jul 2019 (last on MTGS), every month from Aug 2019 (first on MTGN) to Feb 2020, May Jun 2020, Mar Apr Sep Oct 2021, Feb May Sep Dec 2022, Mar May Jun Sep Dec 2023, Jan Mar 2024
CCL - Winner (4): Jul 2016 (tied with Flatline), May 2017, Jul 2019 (last on MTGS), Jun 2021 (tied with slimytrout) || Host (5): Feb 2015, Mar Apr May Jun 2016
DCC - Winner (3): Mar 2015 (tied with Piar), Feb Apr 2022 || Host (12): May Oct 2015, Jan 2016, Jun Sep Dec 2021, Mar Jun Sep Dec 2022, Mar Jun 2023

User avatar
Krishnath
Mechanical Dragon
Posts: 3565
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: he / him
Location: A cave somewhere in Scandinavia

Post by Krishnath » 4 years ago

Alrighty then.

bravelion83 (Aranon, Expert Gardener): Nice combination of an ETB fog effect and a seldom used version of green ramp. What is not to like. Only thing that could have made them better would be if they also gave a bonus to plants, treefolk, and fungus, but it's not that important.

kateodonnell (Merki, Bane of the Sky): Interesting combination of a solid body and a one shot activated ability and ramp. Only real issue I have is that it is pretty expensive for a glorified ramp spell. You did hit both of the elements though, which is a plus.

kwanyeegor-ii (Raghort, the Rolling Avalanche): Now this I like, and it shows both the elements well. It also really feels like a mythic creature. Sure, it's not that big to begin with, being a "mere" 3/3 with trample for five mana, but it can quickly grow to enormous proportions, or grow your other snow creatures. I could see this in a weird snow version of an Atraxa commander deck as one of the 99, just for the growth potential alone. I love it.

RaikouRider (Mergo the Stonegrafter): Ok, this card is weird, but in a good way. It manages to take something usually seen in black or blue (petrification) and make it wholly white in a way that both makes sense and is very flavorful. It is a good and flavorful combination of elements as well. I love it. Good control card.

Henlock (Wickerheart, Greeted at Autumn): For some reason I think this wants to be a legendary Artifact Creature - Scarecrow, while still being black. Probably because all previous scarecrows are artifacts. Other than that, incredibly flavorful card that catches both seasons (autumn in this case) and grains (through corrupted growth via replacing lands with basic swamps). Almost a home run, but it not being an artifact really irks me. Still a good card I could see a deck being built around in Commander.

barbecube (Edha, the Desert Wind): At least the effect isn't Fade Away. Still not a fun card to play against. Feels very oppressive if it gets to attack. Still it catches the flavor of its elements fairly well, and without protection it is fairly easy to deal with. It's a good card, perhaps a little to good, but good nevertheless.

#1: kwanyeegor-ii
#2: Raikourider
#3: Henlock. You would have been higher, but it not being an artifact was a major flavor issue that dragged it down.
Numquam evolutioni obstes. Solum conculceris.

Pascite draconem, evolvite aut morimini.

The Commander Legacy Project, Come say hello and give your thoughts.

Like to read? Love books and want to recommend one to your fellow forum users? Go here.

User avatar
barbecube
Posts: 141
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: he / him
Location: London

Post by barbecube » 4 years ago

zdtsd
Show
Hide
The poison-threshold setting effect of this card is interesting. Nice work.
slimytrout
Show
Hide
How are you intending to get the sleep counters off this guy? I think it should simply have defender until its counters are removed, or have a different counter-removal condition.
Gateways7
Show
Hide
Don't have much to say about this. It's mostly white, snowfall seems ok, etc.
BeneTleilax
Show
Hide
I appreciate how simple this card is. Nice. Unfortunately DQed for nonlegendary.
netn10
Show
Hide
There are some wording issues here but I appreciate the concept.
marioguy3
Show
Hide
I can't get behind this amount of ambush blockers (with split second!!!) in blue.
Top 3
Show
Hide
1. Gateways7
2. zdtsd
3. netn10
formerly willows

User avatar
Gateways7
Posts: 151
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: they / them

Post by Gateways7 » 4 years ago

Subject16 - Olmo seems like a bit of a stretch of the flavor (hah) of the idea of dust, as I don't really see where dust fits into the card other than the reference in the flavor text that doesn't make sense. Other than that, the card is pretty cool, and I like the two abilities interacting well together and creating a fun loop.

Dragonlover - I don't really get the flavor of this card, but it seems pretty fun, although it seems like it can get pretty strong with a sacrifice outlet.

Ink-Treader - This is a really cool idea to make snow-matters work in red, but the number of loyalty counters on it seems like it could get very high quickly, and the minus X seems very underpowered, and although I know it's technically in red color pie, it does not feel red at all.

Jimmy Groove - This god seems really strong, especially with that reanimation clause, but the idea of a deathtouch-matters creature is super cool, so overall this is a great idea!

zdtsd - That last ability doesn't feel necessary (10 is enough), and this ability feels like it would fit a lot better into blue than green.

slimytrout - While this is a really cool idea, it feels like one of those designs that tries to be clever but sacrifices good gameplay, especially because both Enrage and dealing your own creature damage don't fit at all with blue.

1. JimmyGroove
2. Subject16
3. Ink-Treader

User avatar
void_nothing
Look On My Sash...
Posts: 14927
Joined: 4 years ago
Answers: 124
Pronoun: he / him
Location: Tal Terig, Zendikar

Post by void_nothing » 4 years ago

Congrats to our top 8:

Ink-Treader
Krishnath
Subject16
kwanyeegor-ii
Henlock
Gateways7
bravelion83
netn10

Next round to come tomorrow morning at the latest.
Psst, check the second page of Custom Card Contests & Games! Because of the daily contests, a lot of games fall down to there.

The greatest (fake) pro wrestling on the internet - Collaborative Create-A-Booster - My random creations (updated regularly)

Important Facts: Colorless is not a color, Wastes is not a land type, Changeling is not a creature type

Locked Previous topicNext topic

Return to “Contest Archives”