September MCC, Round 3: Colossus

[void_nothing]

Banner based on Yawgmoth's Vile Offering by Noah Bradley and Wizards of the Coast. Thanks to bravelion83 for the "Core Set Style" MCC Logo

September MCC, Round 3 - Colossus

Welcome to the September MCC! It's Phyrexian Month here at the MCC and by the end of it compleation will fall over this website...

Main Challenge: Design an artifact creature card with base power and toughness each 8 or greater.
Subchallenge 1: Your card has converted mana cost 7 or less.
Subchallenge 2: Your card has less toughness than power.

DEADLINES

Design deadline: Thursday, September 26th 23:59 EDT

Judging deadline: Sunday, September 29th 23:59 EDT

Clarifications

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Main challenge - Even though the challenge has Phyrexian flavor the card need not. Your entry can be as non-Phyrexian as "Narnam Big Rig" or as Phyrexian as "Kerrick's Muscle Car", so to speak.

MCC Rubric

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Design
(X/3) Appeal - Do the different player psychographics (Timmy/Johhny/Spike) have a use for the card?
(X/3) Elegance - Is the card easily understandable at a glance? Do all the flavor and mechanics combined as a whole make sense?

Development
(X/3) Viability - How well does the card fit into the color wheel? Does it break or bend the rules of the game? Is it the appropriate rarity?
(X/3) Balance - Does the card have a power level appropriate for contemporary constructed/limited environments without breaking them? Does it play well in casual and multiplayer formats? Does it create or fit into a deck/archetype? Does it create an oppressive environment?

Creativity
(X/3) Uniqueness - Has a card like this ever been printed before? Does it use new mechanics, ideas, or design space? Does it combine old ideas in a new way? Overall, does it feel "fresh"?
(X/3) Flavor - Does the name seem realistic for a card? Does the flavor text sound professional? Do all the flavor elements synch together to please Vorthos players?

Polish
(X/3) Quality - Points deducted for incorrect spelling, grammar, and templating.
(X/2) Main Challenge (*) - Was the main challenge satisfied? Was it approached in a unique or interesting way? Does the card fit the intent of the challenge?
(X/2) Subchallenges - One point awarded per satisfied subchallenge condition.

Total: X/25
*An entry with 0 points here is subject to disqualification.

Judges:
void_nothing
bravelion83
slimytrout

Players:
Gateways7
Rithaniel
SecretInfiltrator
barbecube
Henlock
Sagharri
kwanyeegor-ii

[Gateways7]

Whirling Colossus 3
Artifact Creature - Construct (rare)
Trample
Whenever Whirling Colossus attacks or blocks, sacrifice all other permanents you control. Until the end of turn, you don't lose unspent mana as steps and phases end.
11/8



Pair with Faith's Reward, Gerrard Weatherlight Hero, Open the Vaults, Second Sunrise, Splendid Reclamation, Brought Back, or Thrilling Encore for the value plays.

[kwanyeegor-ii]

Ultralith of Pure Mana 7
Artifact Creature--Elemental (Mythic)
Vigilance
When Ultralith of Pure Mana enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you sacrifice a land that can produce W, one that can produce U, one that can produce B, one that can produce R, one that can produce G, and one that can produce C.
When Ultralith of Pure Mana dies, reveal your hand. Put all land cards revealed in this way onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle the rest into your library and draw that many cards.
12/10

[barbecube]

Eyebeam Colossus

5CC

Artifact Creature — Golem

Trample
You can't cast creature spells.
Discard a card: Eyebeam Colossus deals 2 damage to target creature.

10/8

Render

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[Sagharri]

Dreadhide Fiend 3UUBB
Artifact Creature - Leviathan Horror (R)
Trample
When Dreadhide Fiend enters the battlefield, sacrifice any number of permanents. Then put X -1/-1 counters on it, where X is 13 minus total converted mana cost of permanents sacrificed this way.
1UB, Remove -1/-1 counter from Dreadhide Fiend: Target player puts top three cards of their library into their graveyard.
20/20

[Rithaniel]

Maw of the Silversea
Legendary Artifact Creature - Leviathan M
Islandwalk, lifelink, vigilance
Maw of the Silversea can't attack or block unless you have at least 10 life more than your starting life total.
Sacrifice an artifact: You gain X life, where X is the sacrificed artifact's converted mana cost.
10/9

[SecretInfiltrator]

Scrapyard Dreadnought 7
Artifact Creature — Dreadnought (R)
When Scrapyard Dreadnought attacks or blocks, sacrifice it at end of combat. If you do, create four colorless 3/2 Vehicle artifact tokens with crew 1.
The defenses of Trashkeep Bastion are never expected to last past a single battle. A broken construct just returns to the grand cycle of junk.
12/8

SPOILER

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Scrapyard Dreadnought 7
Artifact Creature — Dreadnought (R)
When ~ attacks or blocks, sacrifice it at end of combat. If you do, create four 3/2 Vehicle artifact tokens with crew 1.
The defenses of Trashkeep Bastion are never expected to last past a single battle. A broken construct just returns to the grand cycle of junk.
12/8

[Henlock]

Forsaken Colossus
Artifact Creature - Golem (r)
This spell costs less to cast for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Forsaken Colossus gets -3/-3 for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Creatures with power greater than Forsaken Colossus's power can't block it.
9/8

[void_nothing]

And that'll be it for the round. This is the versus round; each judge will get two brackets of two or three contestants each to score. The ONE top scorer in each bracket as determined by their total score from both of their judges will advance to the finals.

void_nothing:
Gateways7 vs. Sagharri
kwanyeegor-ii vs. barbecube vs. Rithaniel

bravelion83:
kwanyeegor-ii vs. barbecube vs. Rithaniel
SecretInfiltrator vs. Henlock

slimytrout:
SecretInfiltrator vs. Henlock
Gateways7 vs. Sagharri

[slimytrout]

Both brackets complete:

Gateways7

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Whirling Colossus 3
Artifact Creature - Construct (rare)
Trample
Whenever Whirling Colossus attacks or blocks, sacrifice all other permanents you control. Until the end of turn, you don't lose unspent mana as steps and phases end.
11/8

Design
Appeal 2.5/3 - Timmy loves this card – enormous and can be played very early. Johnny likes it for its unusual aspects – high power-CMC ratio, mass sacrifice, mana pools not draining. Spike likes the choices this initially promotes, but it's a little too high variance for them to love it, and when you've attacked with it once suddenly you have *no* choices.
Elegance 2.5/3 – Slight ding for the "unspent mana…" clause – it makes sense when you think about it, but isn't immediately clear why it's necessary.
Development
Viability 3/3 – As has been established multiple times this MCC, rare artifacts can do pretty much anything.
Balance 2/3 – Yeesh, this would make for some unfun limited and standard play. In limited, if your opponent kills it within two turns, they basically win, otherwise they lose. In standard it depends a lot more on what the support/hate cards are, but if there's any sort of cheap haste-granting, they only have one turn to kill it, and creature-based strategies might be almost entirely bricked.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2.5/3 – Was going to give you full points, but then found Hellcarver Demon. The whole package is still pretty new, but none of the abilities are truly unique.
Flavor 2/3 – Could definitely use flavor text, which it has room for. The broad picture definitely makes sense – "colossus"=big, "whirling"=destroy all your stuff. But where does the mana thing fit in? And who is building this thing?
Polish
Quality 1.5/3 – Should just be "until end of turn" – no "the" (-0.5). Also, you're really not supposed to write anything other than your post, especially if it seems to be intended to sway the judging rather than just for fun (-1). You've been penalized for this before, so I know you know the rule.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Met.
Subchallenges 2/2 – Both met.
TOTAL 20/25

vs.

Sagharri

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[Dreadhide Fiend 3UUBB
Artifact Creature - Leviathan Horror (R)
Trample
When Dreadhide Fiend enters the battlefield, sacrifice any number of permanents. Then put X -1/-1 counters on it, where X is 13 minus total converted mana cost of permanents sacrificed this way.
1UB, Remove -1/-1 counter from Dreadhide Fiend: Target player puts top three cards of their library into their graveyard.
20/20

Design
Appeal 2.5/3 - Timmy loves it – comes out huge and gets huger. Johnny likes it too, for sacrifice combos and for milling. Spike doesn't love how all-in this is with no protection from removal, and generally isn't into milling people starting on turn 7, but obviously the base case of a 7-mana 7/7 trample isn't too shabby.
Elegance 2/3 – Complicated X costs just aren't that elegant, and there's not much of a way around that.
Development
Viability 3/3 – Definitely more black than blue (other than the fact that it's a leviathan), but milling is very much in the Dimir wheelhouse so not a problem. For sure gotta be rare or mythic, and it might have too much text to be a mythic (even though 20/20 statline pushes the other way).
Balance 3/3 – I mean, it's gotta be a beast in limited, which has smaller libraries and less removal, although UUBB in the cost will prevent splashing. In constructed, it's basically impossible for a 2-color 7-mana card with no way to protect itself and no relevant ETB to be playable, so unless there's some infinite combo this sets off with its mass sacrifice, it probably wouldn't see play.
Creativity
Uniqueness 3/3 – Kind of like an inverted version of devour, but also references CMC, and then has some Wickerbough Elder-style milling thrown in, which we've never seen before – enough to earn it a full score.
Flavor 2.5/3 – Not enough room for flavor text, but the whole picture basically makes sense. Only complaint is that nothing about the card says it should be an Artifact, so you clearly added that on to meet the challenge.
Polish
Quality 2/3 – Missing a lot of articles: should be "minus the total," "remove a -1/-1 counter," and "puts the top three." Since these are all versions of the same mistake, I'll only take off 1 point even though there are three instances.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 1/2 – Even P/T.
TOTAL 21/25

SecretInfiltrator

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Scrapyard Dreadnought 7
Artifact Creature — Dreadnought (R)
When Scrapyard Dreadnought attacks or blocks, sacrifice it at end of combat. If you do, create four colorless 3/2 Vehicle artifact tokens with crew 1.
The defenses of Trashkeep Bastion are never expected to last past a single battle. A broken construct just returns to the grand cycle of junk.
12/8

Design
Appeal 3/3 – An all-rounder. Timmy likes it because it's big and leaves things behind when it dies. Johnny likes it because it produces four permanents when it dies, which could definitely enable some busted stuff. Spike likes the profusion of vehicles that it leaves behind, which lead to complicated combat.
Elegance 3/3 – 12/8 becomes four 3/2's. Neat.
Development
Viability 2.5/3 – Perhaps this is a little mean, since I've kept repeating how all rare artifacts are viable, but I think this would be better at mythic. It has a strong statline (12 power for 7 mana), a splashy effect (4 tokens), and would be definitely annoying to face in limited, where it can go in any deck.
Balance 3/3 – A house in limited, where it's not unusual to have a few creatures lying around to crew things, but certainly not stronger than Wurmcoil Engine. Maybe even playable in standard even at 7 mana, since it's big and leaves things behind when it dies, although hard to tell exactly what shell it would go in.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2/3 – Runaway Carriage meets Wurmcoil Engine. So the main innovation is that the tokens are vehicles, which, although not a terribly difficult leap, is a token we've never had before.
Flavor 3/3 – Yeah, it's made of the parts of other stuff, so it just falls apart into smaller bits after fighting once. Works for me.
Polish
Quality 3/3 – I'm impressed, because you had two things that I thought might be quality mistakes but which I now realize aren't: "when" vs. "whenever" (I guess because it's only expected to happen once) and "crew" vs. "Crew" (it's a keyword ability, which isn't capitalized unless it's the first word of a line, which it always has been up to this point). So anyway, props.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Met.
Subchallenges 2/2 – Both met.
TOTAL 23.5/25

vs.

henlock

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Forsaken Colossus
Artifact Creature - Golem (r)
This spell costs less to cast for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Forsaken Colossus gets -3/-3 for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Creatures with power greater than Forsaken Colossus's power can't block it.
9/8

Design
Appeal 2/3 - Timmy likes it – it's called a colossus after all, and has an odd sort of Golem tribal. Johnny likes that it has some unusual aspects that he can abuse, but ultimately isn't that into it – sure, they can try to get it out cheaply and then make it bigger afterward, but the payment is "just" a 9/8 with minor evasion (can't even get down to 0 power to become unblockable since it would die). Spike likes that it can sneakily get bigger if they can remove cards from their graveyard, and perhaps that the evasion can be abused by doing so, but ultimately it's a bit linear for them.
Elegance 2/3 – The last ability isn't really necessary to make the card work, but the first two are fairly elegant, except: why on earth is it "a graveyard"? For the mirror match? Seems very odd to be looking for Golems in your opponent's yard – in a normal format it would be vanishingly unlikely that they'd have any, and in a Golems-matter set it would just be confusing to track.
Development
Viability 3/3 – Rare artifacts, man.
Balance 3/3 – People will play 7-mana 9/8's in limited, so no problem there. Probably not playable in standard without major Golem synergy *and* a way to remove cards from graveyards at instant speed, since it's not busted at any cost, and it's uncastable if you end up with four or more Golems in the yard.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2.5/3 – First ability is like Ghoultree and Cauldron of Eternity but for a specific creature type and including your opponent's yard. Third ability is just skulk but written out. But second ability is definitely unusual – there's never been a creature that gets smaller for the number of creature cards in a graveyard, let alone a specific creature type.
Flavor 2.5/3 – Card would be a bit tight on space with flavor text, so don't blame you for not including it, but would have really helped to explain the last ability: why does a colossus have skulk?
Polish
Quality 3/3 – All good.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 – Yep.
TOTAL 22/25

[bravelion83]

Friday 9/27: As a notice to everyone, I don't think I'll be able to finish these now, and I won't be able to do anything tomorrow as I will spend most of my day at the ELD prerelease. I don't think I'll be able to finish these before the very last day (Sunday).
Saturday 9/28: Ok, back from the ELD 2HG prerelease. If anybody is wondering how it went...

ELD prerelease (totally unrelated to judging, so just skip to that if you don't care about prerelease stories)

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...on one side not well. We went 0-3, last place in the standings and worst result I and my best friend have ever done since we started doing 2HG prereleases together in GRN.
On the other side, exceptionally well. Regardless of the result, we've still had a lot of fun and spending your whole day together with your best friend playing the game you share the love for, maybe the best game in the world, just feels so good! Who cares if we've gone from second place in M20 to dead last in ELD? We've had a wonderful time, and we shared a wonderful experience. That's what really matters. I've been playing in individual prereleases since Morningtide (Lorwyn was supposed to be my first, but the store I went to back then had no place left), but I've just discovered a new world starting 2HG in GRN with him. It turns out even doing things you already love gets even better if you do them with your best friend.
Tournament report. I and my friend had the same promo (Feasting Troll King), a thing that had never happened to us before, but unfortunately we opened a very bad green, and couldn't certainly splash for a quadruple-colored mana cost. So we didn't play green at all. Instead, we opened a lot of Knights, especially in BR, and two Brimstone Trebuchets, a card that I just fell in love with while watching the LRR PPR and that I knew I absolutely wanted to play today. So I built and played a Radkos Knight deck, with the two Trebuchets, one Bonecrusher Giant, and one Barrow Witches (that returns Knights anyway) as the only non-Knight creatures. I had 16 other creatures in my deck, and all were Knights, with most of them costing 2 or 3 mana. I only had a couple that costed 4 and only one costing 5, so my curve was very low (reason why I went with 16 lands). I had 8 pieces of removal in my deck (all the noncreatures in my deck plus one Murderous Rider, also conveniently a Knight).
My friend went with a pretty normal WU control deck based on flying creatures and drawing cards. Neither of us opened any real bombs though, and we felt like that has been probably the biggest cause of our bad record. After the tournament, he came to my house, we had dinner together and then played some more Magic until around midnight, just for good measure. We've also gone mentally through each of our matches, and we felt like we've done only one strategic mistake, but one that costed us the whole game in round 2.
So, story time! It was round 2. My friend had a Flutterfox enchanted with All That Glitters, and the fox was something like an 8/8 with flying. He also had a couple of 1/N non-flying creatures, as did I. It had been a fairly equilibrated match. Both we and they were at rather low life totals, and attacking with the fox would have brought our opponents to either 1 or 2 (can't remember exactly), so we did it. There was a 5/5 Garenbrig Paladin on their side of the battlefield. We were thinking of just chump blocking it and then closing things out with the flying fox next turn. Too bad both I and my friend had completely forgotten that the Paladin has daunt... All of our intended chump blockers had power 1, so none could actually block, and that ended up causing us to lose the game on their counterattack.
In round 1, I was mana screwed. Maybe I should have actually played 17 lands. The game ended with me controlling four lands, of which three Mountains and one Swamp, and having the following hand: Bake Into a Pie (costs double B), Lost Legion (costs double B), Barrow Witches (costs five mana), and double Searing Barrage (costs five mana). The Witches and the two Barrages were the only cards in my whole deck costing five mana, and I had none costing six or more.
In round 3 (last round) we defended as best we could from a Rankle, Master of Pranks holding Embercleave. It turns out Rankle's trigger is just busted if you get to do it twice per combat phase thanks to the sword granting double strike...
Anyway, we've both loved the set and how it plays. We've still both got to do what our decks wanted to do, and I've absolutely loved playing a Knight deck based on the Trebuchets, I'm wondering whether something like that could be Standard viable after my monored Challenger Deck (the only Standard one I have, only modified with 4-ofs of Light Up the Stage and Skewer the Critics) almost completely rotates out in just a week.
When back at my home, he was also thinking that maybe he should have gone BG, using the not too many decent cards we had got in G, both of our promos, and the few B cards left out from my Rakdos Knights deck. The result was a BG deck centered around Food tokens, producing a lot of them and sacrificing them not to their own lifegain effect, but to other more interesting effects. There were essentially a bunch of Food producers and some things that consumed Food for profit. We've built that deck, and he tried to play it against my own. We've both been quite impressed by it, and now we're both convinced that he should have just built that instead of a WU deck to try to stay off of my colors.
LVP (least valuable players), aka cards that hugely disapponted me today:
- Rimrock Knight - The +2/+0 has only been relevant once, and the "can't block" is way bigger of a drawback than I thought.
- Stormfist Crusader - It turns out that giving cards to your opponents too and mostly losing a lot of life over the course of the game, as our opponents didn't want to kill it, is also way too big of a drawback. I finally found a way to get rid of it once we were at 3, having lost at the very least 12 life to it, and that way was just using it to chump block when it was already too late.
Instead, Blow Your House Down surprised me when our opponents played it targeting our only three creatures, one of which was a Trebuchet of mine that got destroyed for technically being a Wall, even though a trebuchet is absolutely not a wall in real life... Obviously, that allowed them to make an alpha strike that heavily damaged us.
Oh, and by the way there was a team in the store where both players opened Oko, Thief of Crowns from boosters (not as either of their promos). One of them built a GU deck around the two copies of Oko and they obviously did very well in the tournament (can't remember if they won the whole thing, but they definitely had a good record at the end).
Ok, sorry for this aside, but I wanted to share it. Back to what you're actually here for. The judgments.

Sunday 9/29: Judgments complete. Writing judgments the day after having fun with my best friend at a prerelease has been an excellent way to spend my birthday!

---

kwanyeegor-ii

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Ultralith of Pure Mana 7
Artifact Creature--Elemental (Mythic)
Vigilance
When Ultralith of Pure Mana enters the battlefield, sacrifice it unless you sacrifice a land that can produce W, one that can produce U, one that can produce B, one that can produce R, one that can produce G, and one that can produce C.
When Ultralith of Pure Mana dies, reveal your hand. Put all land cards revealed in this way onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle the rest into your library and draw that many cards.
12/10

Design
Appeal 1.5/3 - Timmy likes a creature this big, but he would prefer to pay more mana for it rather than having to sacrifice six lands. Spike is the one who wouldn't mind doing exactly that to get a huge discount in mana, but the huge tempo loss might be a little too much even to her. Yes, you could get some lands back when this dies, but what if it gets exiled? Shuffled into the library? Returned to hand? Or in general anything that gets rid of this without it actually dying? In all those cases, you've probably just hugely mana screwed yourself and lost your big creature, on the way to losing to game. Even if it's returned to hand, its owner could cast again in theory, but I don't think they'd have the six lands to sacrifice to avoid having to sacrifice it as soon as it enters the battlefield. Did they have 13 lands? Then why just not cast "little" Emrakul or just wait to have two more mana sources and summon her big sister? Spike would also like the wheel effect to be optional. There is probably something Johnny can do with this.
Elegance 0.5/3 - Honestly, to me this looks like the exact opposite of an elegant card. Very long and intricate text, requires quite some focus and mental energies to be played correctly, and I think a lot of players, especially less experienced ones, would have to read it multiple times to grok it. Vigilance also feels a bit thrown in to me on this card. Not a full zero because at least it looks to me like this should work in the rules just fine and I don't see any unintuitive interactions with other cards at first glance.
Development
Viability 3/3 - Caring about each type of mana (saying "type" of mana includes colorless, saying "color" of mana does not, because, let's all repeat with Maro: "colorless is not a color!") makes this feel either colorless or five-colored, as does the last ability being a mashup of little bits from different colors, so I'd say there are no big problems with this card being colorless. I would have also accepted it as five-colored, but not as anything else. As mythic as it can get.
Balance 1.5/3 - This is just unplayable in limited, unless you are in five colors (and I've never seen a single five colored deck in limited once in 14 years that I've been playing Magic) or just want to sacrifice it every time if you're not. I'd say damned if you do, damned if you don't. In constructed, it's a whole other matter. I can see decks there built specifically to cheat this into play and mitigate the drawback. In older formats (Modern and older), you could use things like Flagstones of Trokair: sacrifice the Flagstones as "the land that can produce W" and search your library for a Plains so that you don't actually lose the land but just substitute it with a basic. If you're able to play around the drawback in a similar way for the other colors too, that's even better. As for the last ability, I don't feel like that changes things too much. Yes, it will give you some lands back, but all six? If when this dies you have six lands in hand, you're not in a good situation anyway. And will you get back the colors you need? And what if you have some nonland cards you really care about and don't want to lose them? Everything is mandatory, from revealing your hand to the wheel effect. Again, I don't feel this changes what I've already written. A creature that mana screws you can pose some problems to casual players, who might play this and then complain that they haven't been able to do anything else for the rest of the game. I don't see particular problems in multiplayer.
Creativity
Uniqueness 3/3 - No doubts here. This is absolutely new.
Flavor 2.5/3 - I first read the name as "Ultralight" but that's my bad. I realized my mistake very quickly. I'm still not the biggest fan of the name, but it does its job just fine, given the mechanics. Absolutely no room for flavor text, it's already ten lines and two breaks in the M15 frame as shown by MSE, and that's the current limit (Animate Dead from EMA), so no problems with that.
Polish
Quality 0/3 - Ok, this shouldn't be new by now. Name not bolded, serious formatting mistake (-1). Double dash on the type line without a space before and afterwards (let's just consider all of that together and just go -0.5). Good that at least all periods are there this time. If I can dare to give you a piece of advice, try to start minding about these things, at the very least in the MCC, but everywhere really. In the MCC, it's like you're always automatically starting with a self-imposed 1.5-2 point handicap. Why would you want to do that?
But wait, there's more this time. In the first triggered ability, all six instances of "can" should be "could" (see Reflecting Pool for example, normally I'd do -0.5 for each instance, which would already be enough to give this card a zero here even if all the rest were correct, but given the situation, let's just include all the six instances in a single -1). I'm also not sure at all about the repeated use of the pronoun "one", I feel like this card should repeat "a land" every time, but there is no precedent that I've been able to find, so I won't deduct any points for that. In the last ability, there is an extra "in" before "this way" that shouldn't be there: "...revealed this way..." (-0.5).
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 - Both met.
TOTAL 16/25

barbecube

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Eyebeam Colossus

5CC

Artifact Creature — Golem

Trample
You can't cast creature spells.
Discard a card: Eyebeam Colossus deals 2 damage to target creature.

10/8

Design
Appeal 2/3 - Timmy likes everything here, but the line "you can't cast creatures" would very probably just cause him to put this card into his trade binder rather than his deck. At least you can discard the creatures you can't cast to the last ability, so they won't be just stuck in your hand, but Timmy doesn't want to discard them. He wants to cast them! That same line is also a very nice challenge for Johnny, and he could also use the last ability rather easily. Spike approves.
Elegance 3/3 - No problems here.
Development
Viability 3/3 - No big problems here. My only little remark is that the last ability does feel a bit red, but there is still a whole history of colorless artifacts dealing direct damage, and thankfully this doesn't hit players (in which case I would have just said this needed to be red). All the rest is fine in colorless, as is rarity.
Balance 3/3 - The drawback looks huge but workable. This golem has 10 power and trample, so you probably won't need to cast more creatures after it, it will close the game just by itself. It also can get rid of potential blockers to make more damage go through, and I especially like that the last ability gives you a use for the cards that you can't cast from your hand anymore, so that they won't just turn into dead cards in your hand. I also like the two colorless mana in the mana cost preventing this from just being played in every deck, especially in limited. In draft, you will have to draft your Wastes like in OGW or provide yourself with ways to have that colorless mana, which shouldn't be too difficult to do, but also not trivial. In sealed you will just need to get lucky, but this is kinda always true, and me and my best friend have had our own example yesterday (see my "prerelease stories" spoiler above if you want to know more). In constructed, we've already seen purely colorless decks around the time of OGW, and in fact some even talk about "Eldrazi winter". If the double colorless mana cost isn't too much of a problem in the Standard format this would be in, it would probably see play there. Colorless Eldrazi decks still exist in older formats, and this could fit in there. I don't think casual players will like the "can't cast creatures" line, but they will love to close the game with this, probably focusing the rest of the deck on ways to protect this from removal, in addition to having other creatures for curve purposes, possibly mana dorks to get this out even faster. Might such a deck even be competitive? Who knows? The choice of which player to kill with this first might get interesting in multiplayer, where politics are relevant.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2.5/3 - So, a bigger Steel Golem meets a slightly more restrictive Seismic Assault. Not a lot of cards exist in those lines though, and they've also never met on the same card before. Also, despite how strange it might seem, I've made my research and there is no existing colorless artifact with C in its mana cost.
Flavor 2/3 - Interesting how both you and Henlock have used the word "Colossus" in the card name, but no problems with that. I have no real elements to say that either one has copied the other. I would have probably liked the name even better if this were a Cyclops ("Eyebeam Cyclops" just looks too good of a name to me to not be real) but this is perfectly fine for a Golem. Plenty of room for flavor text here, so its absence is a problem.
Polish
Quality 3/3 - All good.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 - Both met.
TOTAL 22.5/25

Rithaniel

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Maw of the Silversea
Legendary Artifact Creature - Leviathan M
Islandwalk, lifelink, vigilance
Maw of the Silversea can't attack or block unless you have at least 10 life more than your starting life total.
Sacrifice an artifact: You gain X life, where X is the sacrificed artifact's converted mana cost.
10/9

Design
Appeal 2.5/3 - Attacking and blocking are exactly what Timmy wants to do! Yes, he likes gaining life too, so this is not the worst card to him, but it's also far from the best. A very open-ended last ability and a very nice challenge (finding the best way to have this get able to attack and block) for Johnny. Spike is in love with the CMC-to-P/T ratio, and she doesn't mind a drawback to get that. At least it's a drawback that she can play around rather easily, either by using the last ability that's been conveniently placed on this card, or by using other cards and effects.
Elegance 2.5/3 - Not the shortest text, but as short as possible for what it does, and still very easy to understand.
Development
Viability 2/3 - Three colors, one keyword per color: islandwalk is obviously blue, vigilance white, and lifelink black. The only colored card with the "10 life more than your starting life total" ability is Ayli, Eternal Pilgrim, which is conveniently white and black. Sacrificing an artifact is something all three colors can do just fine, and the lifegain is white. I also agree that this is totally deserving of mythic status. I only have a rather big remark: cards in the MCC are always supposed to be designed to the current design standards, and as of today, landwalk is no longer supported, being there in the CR only for backwards-compatibility. Today, this card wouldn't be printed as is just because of that.
Balance 2.5/3 - I see the idea you went with here: a hugely undercosted creature with a very restrictive mana cost thanks to the new focus on colored artifacts. And the execution looks definitely good enough to me, even though of course to be able to go as low as four mana you needed an additional drawback. But you provide means to work around the drawback on the card itself, which is a thing I like a lot. In limited working with this will be a real challenge, you need to be in three specific colors and have either a lot of artifacts or multiple other ways to gain life. Johnny is certainly up to the challenge, and while difficult, I can see it actually working from time to time. In constructed there are no big problems. Step 1: build around this. Step 2: make it your finisher. Step 3: profit! Only one little remark: pay attention to the "sac an artifact" ability not having a mana cost. Might some kind of unwanted infinite loops hide somewhere? All the rest is definitely good enough to me. I see no problems in casual or multiplayer.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2/3 - We've already seen the "10 life more than your starting life total" thing on Ayli, Eternal Pilgrim and Chalice of Life, but only those two specific cards ever. A few cards with activated abilities that sacrifice artifacts and then check the sacrificed artifact's CMC also already exist, but not one that gives you life.
Flavor 2/3 - The name is good. I had to check MSE to make sure the type line fits in the M15 frame. It turns out it very barely does. MSE also shows that up to a couple lines of flavor text could have also fit without any problems, maybe even more.
Polish
Quality 2.5/3 - Lifelink should come before vigilance, example: Dwarf Whitehawk... Uhm, I meant Aerial Responder. (-0.5) Landwalk coming before vigilance is correct, example: Mirri, Cat Warrior, so the first line here should read "Islandwalk, vigilance, lifelink".
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 - Both met.
TOTAL 20/25

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SecretInfiltrator

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Scrapyard Dreadnought 7
Artifact Creature — Dreadnought (R)
When Scrapyard Dreadnought attacks or blocks, sacrifice it at end of combat. If you do, create four colorless 3/2 Vehicle artifact tokens with crew 1.
The defenses of Trashkeep Bastion are never expected to last past a single battle. A broken construct just returns to the grand cycle of junk.
12/8

Design
Appeal 2.5/3 - Timmy likes this. Spike likes the rate here, even if you're forced to sacrifice this you will still have 12 total power and 8 total toughness, just as before, with an advantage (being separate permanents helps against removal) and a disadvantage (a crew 1 cost that wasn't there before. Maybe Johnny could do something with the Vehicle tokens, even if I don't see what for now. I'll just let him take care of coming up with something.
Elegance 2.5/3 - Not too long and easy enough to understand, but I think that Vehicle tokens could cause a few logistical issues. If players are just using objects to represent tokens instead of the official tokens found in boosters, how will they distinguish Vehicle tokens from other regular creature tokens? Not a big problem, after all nowadays a lot of players just use official tokens, but it's still something to think about. A detail that as a huge Mel I'm in love with: four 3/2 tokens are exactly a total of 12 power and 8 toughness. This greatly improves the card from a holistic point of view. If the numbers were different, this card would have felt wrong and dissonant.
Development
Viability 3/3 - I can see a colorless artifact doing all of this, and I agree it should be rare.
Balance 2/3 - I essentially only see two problems here. One that I've already touched upon is the logistics of Vehicle tokens, but I feel like that's totally solvable and without too much difficulty. The other, the real one, is the universal playability of artifacts with generic-only mana costs, that's exactly the reason why they've pushed colored artifacts recently. Everybody can play this, everywhere, in all decks and formats. I don't think this is the second coming of Smuggler's Copter (a card that I really really enjoyed before it was banned in Standard, still maybe one of my favorite cards ever), but it does share this particular problem with it, that has been one of the factors pushing the Copter into the banlands (you can choose whether the pun is intended or not). Maybe this needed to be a colored artifact too? I think so, probably either white or red. I think it would be especially interesting in red. Also, the drawback is not really a drawback here. Yes, you need creatures to crew the Vehicle tokens, but that's it. The total power and toughness is the same, as I've already mentioned, and while needing to crew those is a drawback, often having a big amount of power and toughness spread out on multiple smaller bodies rather than one single huge one can even be an advantage.
Creativity
Uniqueness 3/3 - Well, Dreadnought is a creature type that's been only retroactively applied to one single card ever in the Grand Creature Type Update at the time of Lorwyn: Phyrexian Dreadnought. Consulate Dreadnought also exists, even though it's a Dreadnought only in flavor and not in creature type, also because it's a Vehicle. This essentially puts those two cards together, with the addition of Vehicle tokens, that are new, no questions asked.
Flavor 3/3 - No problems here. The flavor of this card is just perfect in my opinion, and the flavor text is especially good.
Polish
Quality 2/3 - As mentioned both in the guidelines and also recently in the discussion thread, you should not include anything in your submission post except for your text card and an optional render. You've posted a spoiler containing an earlier version of your card, which I've only seen is there but then I immediately closed the spoiler without reading it. I don't want to see it before having finished my judgment of your real submission. I can also distinctly remember that this is not the first time you do that. I'm not going to deduct any points for this here, because it's not like you've posted design notes or anything meant to influence my judgment, but I will advise you that's something best avoided in the future anyway.
With today's wording standards and design technology, splitting the Dreadnought into Vehicles would need to be a reflexive trigger: "When you do, create..." (-0.5).
As it's only deciduous and not evergreen, reminder text for crew should probably be there (-0.5). I agree that it would be a shame, but you might need to cut some of the flavor text to make it fit.
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 - Both met.
TOTAL 22/25

Henlock

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Forsaken Colossus
Artifact Creature - Golem (r)
This spell costs less to cast for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Forsaken Colossus gets -3/-3 for each Golem card in a graveyard.
Creatures with power greater than Forsaken Colossus's power can't block it.
9/8

Design
Appeal 2.5/3 - There is a very high tension between the first two abilities. Spike loves it, while Timmy is not a big fan of it. Spike also loves the high skill that this card requires to be played at its highest (see Balance). Johnny could try something like putting two Golems in his graveyard, cast this for the least amount of mana possible that keeps it alive, then remove those Golems from the graveyard somehow to make this grow.
Elegance 2.5/3 - The text is a bit long overall, and skulk looks like it's easy to understand, but it's a known fact by now that it's actually a bit unintuitive, in fact that's the reason why in the end it wasn't adopted as the UB evergreen keyword as R&D was thinking of doing as they designed it for SOI. I can distinctly remember Maro mentioning all this on Blogatog several times.
Development
Viability 2.5/3 - The only remark I have is that the last ability is just skulk unkeyworded, and skulk is in blue and black. There is only one single precedent of a colorless artifact with skulk, and it doesn't actually have it itself but it grants it: Skeleton Key. No problems with rarity.
Balance 2/3 - The first ability wants you to play a lot of Golems. The second as few as possible, ideally none. As I've mentioned, this tension is very interesting, but what will you end up doing? The unkeyworded skulk can be relevant if the second ability prevails over the first one, but if you have this on the battlefield at full power it will very rarely be relevant. In limited, I feel like you'll always play this as a 9/8 skulk for the full mana cost, which isn't even too much, as you often reach seven mana in limited. Not a bad thing, but the other "modes" might just as well not be there: four mana 6/5, or one mana 3/2, both with skulk. Anything more than that will send this directly to the graveyard for having zero toughness as a state-based action. Now that I've typed those other "modes", a couple thoughts come to my mind. First, they are very pushed, especially the one mana 3/2. Second, there is yet one more thing adding to the tension: pay attention not to have more than two Golems in your graveyard! This dies right away in that case! Overall, this feels like an interesting but sometimes dangerous card to play with. I feel like we're still within bounds, but it poses several questions in both deckbuilding and gameplay. Not necessarily a bad thing, but a lot of skill is required to play this card at its best in all situations, yet another reason why Spike loves this card. Another thing to pay attention to: everybody can play this, everywhere, in any deck and format. This is the reason why they've been pushing more towards colored artifacts recently.
Creativity
Uniqueness 2.5/3 - Golem tribal has already been done in New Phyrexia with the Splicer cards, but never caring about Golem cards in graveyards.
Flavor 2/3 - Interesting how both you and barbecube have used the word "Colossus" in the card name, but no problems with that. I have no real elements to say that either one has copied the other. MSE also shows that up to a couple lines of flavor text could have also fit without any problems, maybe even more.
Polish
Quality 2.5/3 - The last line should be "Forsaken Colossus can't be blocked by creatures with greater power." (See all cards with skulk, -0.5)
Main Challenge 2/2 - Good.
Subchallenges 2/2 - Both met.
TOTAL 20.5/25

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Results

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I can't even write TBD anymore thanks to Theros Beyond Death! If that set's code is actually TBD, as Maro implicitly said on Blogatog, I foresee it generating a lot of confusion...

kwanyeegor-ii: 16
barbecube: 22.5
Rithaniel: 20

SecretInfiltrator: 22
Henlock: 20.5

[void_nothing]

Gateways7

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Design
(3/3) Appeal - Txmmy appeal should be obvious. Undercosted huge creatures with crazy drawbacks are a classic Jxnny puzzle. Spike doesn't care about having any other permanents if they can simply kill their opponent.
(2.5/3) Elegance - The very last clause is a bit of a random wrinkle. Obviously it's meant to allow you to float mana in order to cast spells in your postcombat main phase, but it's a hedge on an all-in card and mars the concept a bit.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Artifact and rare feel right.
(2/3) Balance - At a mana cost that's so low and a power that's so high I worry about this card - two unblocked hits with it kill AND it has trample so chumping doesn't work very well, and you can simply play this card when you don't have that many other permanents to sacrifice or when you want to sacrifice your own permanents.

Creativity
(2.5/3) Uniqueness - Spiritual successor to the likes of Leveler and Eater of Days but relatively unique.
(1/3) Flavor - I can't confess that I really get it. I guess from the art that you meant for this to be a big siege machine that essentially "runs over" all of your own stuff on its way to combat, but that doesn't come across in the name at all - "Whirling" makes me think of returning stuff to hand like a whirlpool, or hosing flyers like a tornado, or anything other than this - and even if you had just used a less generic creature type like Juggernaut I'd be a lot happier.

Polish
(1.5/3) Quality - Extraneous "the", plus explanatory text that would sway judgments - your card has to stand on its own.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 19.5/25

Sagharri

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Design
(2/3) Appeal - Primarily Txmmy/Jxnny - a bit expensive and unwieldy as a combo piece for Spike.
(2.5/3) Elegance - A bit wordy and mathy but nothing too inelegant about this.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Colors and rarity definitely spot-on.
(3/3) Balance - Yes, it's a potential 20/20, but even the ways to "cheat" that are relatively difficult compared to all of the Dark Depths sploitz.

Creativity
(3/3) Uniqueness - A very strange design in many ways. Closest thing is a classic strange thing.
(2/3) Flavor - "Dreadhide" doesn't necessarily get across the exact flavor of the ability but it feels like a Leviathan and horrific, alright.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Looks good.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(1/2) Subchallenges - Square p/t.

Total: 21.5/25

kwanyeegor-ii

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Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - Mostly a Jxnny/Spike thing despite the size; Spike just wants that death trigger, while Txmmy would find it hard to play with (but would still appreciate the massive ramp of the death trigger).
(2/3) Elegance - Rather wordy, especially the drawback.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Definitely artifact-y feeling and definitely mythic.
(1.5/3) Balance - That death trigger is pretty scary considering the card gives you the option to immediately access it.

Creativity
(3/3) Uniqueness - A highly unique card in several ways.
(2/3) Flavor - Name makes a lot of sense with the abilities but it doesn't really connect why this is both an artifact creature and an Elemental flavor-wise.

Polish
(2.5/3) Quality - Not sure about how that ETB ability would be worded on a real card.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 20.5/25

barbecube

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Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - While Txmmy cringes at a harsh drawback but would recognize that a 10/n means you usually won't need to cast more creatures, Jxnny loves to reanimate a discard outlet and Spike would jump at the chance to have a finisher that also systematically wipes out blockers.
(3/3) Elegance - Nicely elegant stuff; all of the abilities are only a few words.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Feels artifact-y and rare.
(3/3) Balance - You get what you pay for here.

Creativity
(1.5/3) Uniqueness - A few obvious points of comparison here, including, weirdly, Kozilek, the Great Distortion.
(1/3) Flavor - Eye beams are resonant and I totally grok that in relation to the burn ability but why the Steel Golem ability is there and why there's C in the cost are a mystery to me. Also boo, you should have made this a Cyclops, then I might even have given you full flavor points despite those other issues.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - Fine.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 21/25

Rithaniel

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Design
(2.5/3) Appeal - A Txmmy/Jxnny special; Spike would rather use an outright win such as Felidar Sovereign as their lifegain payoff but would still consider it at four mana.
(2.5/3) Elegance - Not inelegant so much as it is wordy. The abilities do all connect pretty well, however.

Development
(3/3) Viability - Everything checks out - very much its own colors and very mythic.
(2.5/3) Balance - A swingy card to be sure; and something about a 10/9 islandwalking vigilant lifelinker as a reward for having that high of a life total feels way more win-more than just automatically winning the game for feats like that.

Creativity
(3/3) Uniqueness - Top marks, obviously - what a strange card.
(3/3) Flavor - The flavor elements are making me speculate pretty heavily about the setting this card is meant for, so good job there.

Polish
(3/3) Quality - I would phrase the activated ability as "You gain life equal to the sacrificed artifact's converted mana cost", and not use X so as to not reference a variable more times than is necessary, but the way you didn't isn't wrong.
(2/2) Main Challenge (*) - Done.
(2/2) Subchallenges - And done.

Total: 23.5/25

[void_nothing]

And so our finalists are Sagharri, SecretInfiltrator, and, in a tie, barbecube and Rithaniel! Final round to come soon.