UN-Listed: Dial U for UN

Pygyzy
Posts: 995
Joined: 4 years ago
Pronoun: they / them

Post by Pygyzy » 2 years ago

Had some spare time so I thought I'd get this rolling a little. This is in no way official, you could say UN-authorized, since I haven't talked to @void_nothing about it, but I figure it can't hurt to get a very basic skeleton going.

It's been a while since I've made a skeleton so this will be extremely basic but obviously we can fix it as we go. And here it goes

Un-[CLASSIFIED]: Secrets of WOTC EXPOSED!

Something strange is going on but you're not quite sure what. Things have been a little different lately it seems. Weird cards you've never seen before keep showing up at odd times, when you least expect it. Not just regular playing cards either. No, MAGIC cards.

Was Tarmogoyf printed in Alpha? It seems like an easy answer, but you're not so sure anymore. Is Black Lotus being reprinted in the newest Secret Lair, AGAIN? Yeah, for the 3rd time. Wasn't MaRo tarred and feathered during the Mirrodin Wars? That's right! Now he writes for the Roseanne reboot reboot. And everything is just as it was. Always has been.

A head of lettuce is president. I voted for it. We all did. Remember the Guys in Grey (G.I.G.) we heard about on MOX NEWS? Me neither, never heard of em. Did you get the new iKillbot XL? I hear they fixed the bug that made it wear your face. Cute.

Now let's play some GLEEMAX: THE MAGICING, like we always do. Turn 1 Black Otters, add three otter colored mana, Mox Otter, Channel Otter, play Otter's Mine, Otter's Power-Plant and Otter's Tower, cast Uter, The Spirit Otter, you take 3 otter damage. Go.

Ah yes. Just another normal day.
Colorless 00/XX
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White 00/XX
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Blue 00/XX
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Black 00/XX
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Red 00/XX
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Green 00/XX
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Artifact 00/XX
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Multicolor 00/XX
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Land 00/XX
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Special ??/??
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For Your Consideration
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The Power Nine 3UUU
Artifact (Special Mythic)
Reserved (This card is on the reserve list.)
The Power Nine counts as nine cards always and everywhere. (You figure it out. That's what errata's for.)
T, Shuffle The Power Nine into an opponent's library: Take an extra turn. Draw three cards. Each player shuffles their hand and graveyard into their library and draws seven cards. Add WUBRG plus three mana of any color.
Mechanics (Potentially)
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Obvious: Don't you know what obvious is? If a card with obvious is obviously the top card of your library, you can cast it. Duh!

Banned, restricted, reserved cards matter: BRR (Banned, Restricted, Reserved) cards are banned, restricted and reserved. What does that mean? It's on the cards. Or it should be i hope.

Banding: Everyone loves banding. 'Nuff said

Ambush (You may cast this creature as an instant for its ambush cost during an opponents combat step before blockers are declared. If you do, it blocks a random attacking creature.)
Because combat is boring!

Herd (To herd, move a creature you control touching this creature and no other permanents. Herded creatures get +1/+1 for each other creature in it's herd. Herd only as a sorcery.)
Inspired by cramped bunker filled with ivory guardians, other names i considered were huddle, hunker, and nothing else.

Invade (To invade, put this permanent under target non-Mutant creature you don't own. They're invading the creature on top and also has all text boxes underneath.)
I made this before mutate so obvioualy mutate was my idea. /S

Orbit- A so called stupid idea is probably the coolest mechanic and better than anything ive come up with. (At the beginning of your end step, the opponent to your left gains control of all orbital permanents you control.) Perfect for those players who refuse to do anything at all. Here! Have a space monkey for god sakes just attack!

Food theme: Food. You know it. You need it to survive. Now imagine what can you do with it besides eat it? Not much but ill think of something.

Faster than light (As this creature enters the battlefield or instead of it attacking, an opponent of your choice gains control of it and it deals damage equal to it's power to that player.)
Because superhaste isnt fast enough

Unliving Whuppin' (When this dies, create a 0/0 colorless Ass artifact vehicle token. It has crew -1.) Haha see cuz its a butt and negative crew requires negative power. Because youre riding around in a butt obviously things arent going that great.

Unass N (Put N +1/+1 counters on an Ass vehicle you control. If you don't control one, create a 0/0 colorless Ass artifact vehicle token first.)
Ooo synergy. Ass tribal>Zombie Army any day.

Monster Party: its the party mechanic but with monsters. Because im original.

D100s: Heeeelll yaaaa rolll them bonesss! Sorry i get really excited about dice.

Weird cards: If you see something weird, thats the point.

The 6th color Otter (Its just colorless but an Otter face instead of a diamond. Why not?)
Lets do this!

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