Personality is the real secret sauce of this format...

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RxPhantom
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Post by RxPhantom » 1 week ago

I know the thread title is a little lame, but stay with me.

I've come to realize that my enjoyment of Commander, and Magic as a whole, comes down to the personality of my opponents. It can overcome just about any gameplay issue. I could face down a trio of stax decks with my not-updated-since-2011 Rith, the Awakener deck and still have a blast if the people are cool.

Conversely, there is no game of Magic so epic as to overcome salty attitudes or social incompatibility. I don't know how many people have regular playgroups, but it's hard out here for us solo players. There's a certain group of players at my new LGS that I always try to slot in with, but I'm not always so lucky. They're easygoing and socially adept. All too often though, I'm stuck with ya know...the other ones.

I came across something during my brief dalliance with Twitter that said something to the effect of "I like playing Magic with people whose entire personality isn't Magic." That one really hit the nail on the head.

Anyway, can you relate? Is social compatibility a factor for you? Am I overstating its importance? Can you carry a conversation? Do you pick up on social cues? Do you wish I'd just shut up and move to my end step?
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Treamayne
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Post by Treamayne » 1 week ago

In my experience, you are, if anything, understating the importance. I have not had a regular playgroup since 2016 (paper) and since 2015ish (MTGO - which is why I was trying to build an MTGO clan of people with whom I can expect to enjoy games). I feel the lack.
I would even posit that I have not had a good in-store game experience since 2012 since I don't have a regular store and trying to "check out" stores while traveling invariably leads to games with Randoms that degenerate nearly as fast as MTGO games with randos.
I've been trying to stick with it because I do like Magic, and I've been playing since Dark/Revised was on the shelves. I don;t think my capacity for self-delusion will allow me to stick with it much longer. My best game in years has been on Shandalar (ManaLink rerelease)- and that's s saying something.
V/R

Treamayne

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3drinks
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Post by 3drinks » 1 week ago

RxPhantom wrote:
1 week ago
Anyway, can you relate? Is social compatibility a factor for you? Am I overstating its importance? Can you carry a conversation? Do you pick up on social cues? Do you wish I'd just shut up and move to my end step?
Image
But, nah, I try. Kids these days talk memes and social media crap I don't really get, or new cards I can't hope to remember because new sets release at a blistering pace. I feel a natural disconnect with that culture and current event talks. I just wanna sit down and play a game. If I'm asked a direct question, like, I'll try to answer you, but as an introvert I struggle to be the one to be relied upon to carry a conversation. Even with a woman I've been getting to know for the last couple months, I had to get me a set of conversation starters to help me. Lame, I know.

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duducrash
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Post by duducrash » 1 week ago

Dont get me wrong, I quite like the game of magic that commander games get me. But more than the games, I like doing something. I work too much, Im often tired by the time I get to my car and drive all the way to my LGS I can't function at 100 and I really dont want to function at 100%. Sometimes I'll cruise control, the only decision I'll make is if I should have a beer and crash in my fiancees place or dont so I can drive home. Both the in game interactions that are fun and knowing people, slinging spells and learning that you went to same school with these people and never met, or that this dude took his father to see Dune some funny stuff happened.

There will be days that I'll be all in playing the game, but most days im thankfull for the social aspect the game brings, im not super good at putting myself in those situations, and mtg helps me a lot

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Avacyn Believer
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Post by Avacyn Believer » 1 week ago

RxPhantom wrote:
1 week ago
Anyway, can you relate? Is social compatibility a factor for you? Am I overstating its importance? Can you carry a conversation? Do you pick up on social cues? Do you wish I'd just shut up and move to my end step?
I wholeheartedly agree. I am an advocate of playing for fun, and win as means to end the game, not as the sole reason for playing. I don't remember games by loosing or winning, but by having fun interactions and having a laugh with my opponents. I'd much rather lose and have fun doing it, than win and not have fun.

Yeah, it can certainly be difficult sometime, like with any social situation. You never know who you are going to meet, and not everyone wants to or is social. Some people just want to play. So I try to adjust to the vibe I get from people as the game goes on. So I do think much of the responsibility falls on you, and how you play/build the deck. If you get upset over loosing, you might not make the game a fun memory. Same goes for building decks that stop other people from playing, and using it in a game where they don't expect it.

For bit of context, my job sends me all over, sometime for weeks, sometime for months at a time, so by necessity I had to learn to play with different groups; the furthest I played from home was in Australia (I live in England). Returning to my old groups I started playing EDH with is the best, but I definitely appreciate the social part of this hobby. For me it is a convenient way to meet people.

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pokken
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Post by pokken » 1 week ago

100%. Playing MTGO taught me that I don't like Magic all that much, so much as I like playing Magic with people.

Interestingly, it's increased my desire to just hang out with people over time as well. I always used to need to be doing something, or competing at something, or collaborating at something.

When I was a kid my parents would just have people over and they'd sit around drinking beers and shooting the %$#% or playing pointless card games like Spades or Bridge or Poker or whatever, and I was like damn that's boring. Or my dad it was music, he and his friends would get together, jam, talk music, talk guitars, etc. It was the people that mattered.

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Post by Cyberium » 1 week ago

I concur. If a player intended to beat me with an Oracle combo, I prefer his personality is more like classic Shaggy than the newest Velma.

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Post by Toshi » 1 week ago

pokken wrote:
1 week ago
I don't like Magic all that much, so much as I like playing Magic with people.
This couldn't be more true!

I've been playing MTG and all sorts of card and board games for the last 20 years and the biggest transition i went through was realizing that doing something i like just enough to keep me around with people i really enjoy being with is so much better than doing something i'd really like to do with people i don't have a connection with.

The thing that really made it obvious to me was a new LGS in town, after years of having none. I got to play so many players i've never seen before in a short time! And what did stick with me were never "just" entertaining games, but the genuinely nice people i got to meet along the way.
Several of those initial contacts have become tight friends outside of MTG over the years and i am sure if it's time spent with them it doesn't matter much what we do. If we all were to quit MTG tomorrow we'd just enjoy the time together doing something else. Which is not to say that i don't enjoy playing specifically MTG with them... :grin:

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Post by Jemolk » 6 days ago

There's quite a bit of truth to that. For me, though, playstyle compatibility is also absolutely required. It's true that people being too obnoxious in the social sense can wreck a game, but so can a majorly anticlimactic ending, or getting completely locked out of the game. If I'm going to hang around and chat, that's okay, but I'd prefer if I hadn't been thinking I'd also be playing the game only to be proven wrong, you know? I like Magic, and Commander more specifically, because it's a social game, but I really do want both parts -- the social and the game. Doubly so because I struggle to be remotely social outside of fairly restricted contexts, and the context of a game of Commander helps with that immensely.
39 Commander decks and counting. I'm sure this is fine, and not at all a problem.

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RxPhantom
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Post by RxPhantom » 5 days ago

As I'm sure some of you can relate, I deal with the public extensively at work. People are the best and worst part of my job. So, when I sit down for a game of Magic, I don't want to social interaction to feel like work. I don't want to feign laughter at your lame jokes, walk on eggshells because you throw a tantrum when someone interacts with your board, etc. I don't want to manage you, like, at all. I'm kind of a picky dickhead now that I think about it.
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pokken
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Post by pokken » 5 days ago

RxPhantom wrote:
5 days ago
I don't want to manage you, like, at all.
Never have I empathized more with a phrase. I too am probably kind of a dick tho

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Treamayne
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Post by Treamayne » 5 days ago

RxPhantom wrote:
5 days ago
I'm kind of a picky dickhead now that I think about it.
While it's possible that you may be. . .
I don't want to feign laughter at your lame jokes, walk on eggshells because you throw a tantrum when someone interacts with your board, etc.
^^ That would not be the reason why, as that is entirely reasonable.

If we can't enjoy each other's company, why play together in the first place?

Some of my best "Magic Memories" are from the Military League (that's dating things) in CA, just sitting with a group and slinging cardboard to Weird Al (or whatever albums people brought). We'd either pair off for games or play some multi-player depending on the numbers and inclination. And, except for "events," Dicks just somehow failed to learn of the when and where. . .
V/R

Treamayne

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